musings...

Got a bullying boss?

They are probably insecure and inadequate in some way.

There’s an old adage in management: A class managers hire people better than them, B class managers hire C class people.

Your bullying manager is probably B-class, who, by mistake has hired an A-class person (you) and you make them insecure, because you are better at the job than they are.

Now, all that said, bullying is unacceptable, and you’re going to have to make a plan to deal with it.

Your options are limited, and each has an upside and downside, here’s a few suggestions:

• Pity them a little. No, honestly. They have the problem, not you.
• Keep notes, to cover your ass, you might need them.
• Once you have a body of information, you’re going to have to confront them.

This last bit is tough. It’s probably easier if you work for large corporation and they are not that high up in it. HR will have processes to deal with this (or they should!) If your boss is also the owner, you’re going to need to skip to the last part of the list below. Here’s the process for dealing with them:

Call then out on it (this works particularly well if you they bully you in front of other people) – when they start bullying you, stand up, look them into the face and make it pretty clear (and loud) that they need to cool down and be more professional and that you expect better of them. Then tell them to come back when they can do this.

I make it sound straight forward here, and it never is. But you have to make a call: are you going to put up with this forever? Or, are you going to deal with it?

The latter, really, when you get down to it, is the only way forward.

If they have a boss (and it’s easier if they do), then you’ll need to take it to them at some point: don’t fight alone.

If they are the big boss, and, after confronting them, nothing changes, or it gets worse, then you really are going to have to find another job.

I know, it this current economic climate, that is hard, but stand up for yourself everyday, don’t take the crap, and make sure they know that’s what to expect everyday back from you – this can confuse and keep the bullying at bay for a while. Also let them know you will, without hesitation sue them – even if you don’t intend to. Put some stress back on them. While you play these silly mind-games, get looking for another job.

Bullying is both unprofessional, childish, and completely unacceptable. You know that, make sure your bully does too.

If you’re a senior manager at the place you work, please, make sure bullied employees are protected.

If one of your manager’s is bullying staff, fire them. No ifs or buts, do it now. Your staff deserve better.

If, by some fluke, you ARE a bully and are reading this; sit down, we need to talk.

First off, you are ruining someone else’s life, day in, day out. Ask yourself (and try to be honest with the answer) why you are doing this? To what end? I suspect you’ll be hard-pressed to come up with an answer that you can look yourself in the eye giving, let alone a judge if you get sued. If you enjoy it, get help. But most of all, try to stop. Now. Happy people working for you make for better results for all. Always.

I’ve been lucky, I’ve not been bullied in the work place, but I’ve know a few too many people who have, and it’s beyond not nice. People have committed suicide over this, and what job can possibly be worth that?

If you know someone being bullied, I’d ask you to stand up for them, if you can. If you can’t, I would ask you to ask yourself why?

Image Credit: Bully by Trixer on Flickr (under creative commons usage)